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Sunday, May 06, 2007
i'm an adolescent boy
7:08 PM
working out all the time has gone to my head. sweat makes me spit on the ground, talk with my mouth full while spewing food all over the table. burp. it makes me breathe audibly and go extended periods of time without showering. often i sleep naked and i used to have to wear at least a tank top. i am constantly interrupting people mid sentence and asking them to admire my calves or view and fondle my bicep. every now and then i'll drop down on the ground and show a friend or two or hell, maybe even a stranger the best new ab routine i have learned. when i'm chatting on the phone or waiting in a line, i'll flex my leg muscles and point at it so some innocent bystander is forced to look at how astonishing my ripped legs are. the most interesting part to me is that my body doesn't feel like me anymore. i'll be gesturing and chatting and reach up to scratch my shoulder or something and then i start feeling all the new shapes and texture of my arm and then my chest. i feel like i might as well just snatch my shirt off and start flexing for folks! i know, i know! it's totally over the top and i have to stop...but you know, the first step is admitting that i have a problem, so i'm moving along the correct path. what is the next one? the next step? um.... AH, believing a power greater than myself can restore me to sanity! i doubt that will happen but,we'll see. 0 Comments |
